The first words of the Buddha
PaṭhamabuddhabhāsitagāthāThe verses traditionally held to be the Buddha’s first utterance after awakening, comparing craving to a house…
Tirokuḍḍakaṇḍaṃ
Verses from the Khuddakapāṭha on giving in memory of departed relatives, chanted at memorial merit-making and at the festival for the dead.
Chanted at memorial merit-making for someone who has died — the seventh day, the fiftieth, the hundredth, the festival for the dead, and death anniversaries.
The custom is to chant it after food or gifts have been offered to the monks, and then to pour the water of dedication. The line most people remember is 'idaṃ vo ñātīnaṃ hotu, sukhitā hontu ñātayo' — may this reach my relatives; may my relatives be happy.
You can also chant it at home without monks. Settle the mind, bring to mind the person you miss, and chant slowly.
These verses come from the Khuddakapāṭha, the smallest book in the canon. Tirokuḍḍa means 'outside the walls'. The picture is of departed relatives standing outside the wall, at the crossroads, by the doorposts of what was once their home, while nobody remembers them.
The point of the verses is not the picture but what follows. Those who have gone cannot receive things from here. There is no farming there, no herding, no trade. The one thing that reaches them is the merit that those left behind make with care and dedicate to them — like rain falling on high ground and running down to the low.
Another verse says plainly that weeping, sorrow and lamenting do not help the departed; what helps is doing good and dedicating it. This is not a rule against grieving. Grief is what love does. It simply points out that when you are ready, there is something real you can still do for them.
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